How to Choose Joy

Have you ever noticed that tendency to argue and disagree with your spouse usually always happens on the way to church?  Or just prior or after a ministry opportunity?

I have!

During these margins in time I have become keenly aware of my thinking, feelings and speaking.

This is something I haven't experienced before, where there is such a difference in emotion, communication style and routine.  These times are the times when 'stopping' is a choice!  And an important tool to learn to use.

So, what to do in those margins of time.

In the Journey to the Heart, by Melody Beattie--she writes

"One step at a time.  That's all you can take.  That's all you have to take.  Yes, you have visions you've created of where you want to go.  But you don't get there in one leap.   You get there one step at a time.  That's how you receive your guidance.  Let your faith be strong. Your faith will keep you going through those moments in between steps.  When your faith is strong, you don't look in fear at the journey ahead, wondering if you will get all the guidance you need .. You take the simple steps, one at a time, that lie ahead.  You take them in joy ..."

It's a matter of focus -- tunnel vision -- holding fast to your faith.  Ask yourself 'What is it about NOW that I have to say [this or that] -- fill in the blanks'.  If you evaluate before you speak, allowing your emotion and feelings to settle enough to think, you are DOING the 'one step at a time'.

'Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful.'  Hebrews 10:23

Taking captive every thought.

'We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.' 2 Corinthians 10:5

So now that you are able to take one step at a time, when you are ready to speak and process, ask yourself 'is this thought you have and, are going to share, in line with what Christ would have you share'?

One thing I would like to add is that in my last post about being in 'the cave' phase of my life the behavior choice I describe above was difficult.  When you are in a difficult time in your life, you have to force yourself to put one foot in front of the other and do what needs to be done.  As Melody Beattie shares

"But when we operate that way for too long, we can be separated from our heart, separated from our desires, and instincts, and healthy inclinations.  Separated from that part of us that lives and loves ... separated from joy."

She continues describing a difficult time in her life;

"I was operating from sheer will, and that will was struggling hard to overcome the desire to give up."

 She became tired of forcing herself.  Tired of pushing through, and realized that she had climbed the mountain.  She was over the top, and she was coming alive again.

My point is ... in that moment when those thoughts begin, remember to choose joy and rely on your faith to get you through; not on what is 'going on' around you.  It might be words that could 'bate' you to respond unkindly and into the pit you go; or it might be a chore left undone that spurs your thinking to spiral; this is where the REAL fight is. 

Where will you allow your thoughts to go?  

You are responsible for your thinking and doing.

Come out of 'the cave' and over 'the mountain' ... there's JOY on the other side -- my dear sister in Christ.